Showing posts with label 1D. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 1D. Show all posts

Thursday, 7 August 2014

Sarcasm

I can't be asked today so I thought I'd provide you with band-related sarcasm.

NO CHILDREN


YES FAKE WILL FERRELL ACCOUNT


SERIOUSLY THOUGH, WTF IS THAT OUTFIT?


HM...


EMINEM IS A FAR BETTER RAPPER IF YOU'RE INTO THAT SHIT, AND FALLING IN REVERSE IS NOT METAL, I ACTUALLY HATE THE GUTS OF WHOEVER MADE THIS


I LOVE WHOEVER MADE THIS


IT READS 'DESIGNED FOR HUMANS' IF YOU CAN'T SEE


Wednesday, 6 August 2014

Weird Conversations with Directioners

I recently engaged in a really bizarre troll war with a series of Directioners on a website. I'll change their names for anonymity etc, but yeah. I'll just say, I'm really bad for this, I engage in arguments really easily.

I POST A PICTURE A PICTURE OF FALL OUT BOY AND NIRVANA MERCH THAT HAS ONE DIRECTION'S PICTURES AND LOGO'S EDITED INTO THEM.

ME AND A FEW OTHER REASONABLE PEOPLE TALK ABOUT HOW IT MUST BE A BREACH OF COPYRIGHT.

Amy (yndo): Ya guys are so mean
(RANDOM COOL GIRL THAT LIKES PARAMORE): We're not being mean here, it's them. They stole things that belong to other band! Not cool, not gonna earn my respect. But hey, just proving my point about how they aren't original.

Amy (yndo): Well ya.... But still saying that they (haven't) got talent is rude..

Louise Xx (me): Do you realise how the directioners told a five year old to kill herself? How rude we must be. 
This is not only a violation of copyright but a breach of moral dedication, by a band that are autotuned to such an extent they'd be unrecognisable in person.

Amy (yndo): Well your saying the directioners are rude! Don't say the one direction is rude and untalented cuz that's not true or else they wouldn't have been signed

Me: Really? They wouldn't have been signed? Do you realise the X Factor is an over decorated talent show who'd sign anyone with a nice face for the pure purpose of selling bubblegum fake pop to a bunch of musically illiterate preteen children?

Amy (yndo): Not really.... 

Amy (yndo): To be honest that is your thought!!! So many great artists got signed cuz the X Factor

Me: Lists? Little Mix, the band who's been enveloped in controversy due to the excessive voice altering? Jedward, the young Irish kids who've mistakenly been turned into a mockery by people they were instructed to trust? Or the hundred and one other nobodies that the show wheeled out?

COOL PARAMORE GIRL: Amy, get of the board please. You arguing your point is pointless, and now you're making me mad. Just get off.

Amy (yndo): INSULTS ME THEN DELETES POST

Me: (refusing to give up in the troll war) And perhaps you should research grammar rules to improved your advantages in arguments rather than personally insulting people for simply not liking a band.

Amy (yndo): Darling.. If I wanted a grammar class I would take it!!

Me: I suggest you do because I really can't take you seriously when you don't use it. And please don't call me darling. 

Amy (yndo): Well that's just you...!!

Me: What is it exactly that's 'just me'?

Amy: Well... your opinion!

Me: And that would be? The opinion that grammar is important, because I believe that's an opinion shared with the English education system, or the opinion that every X Factor export is talentless, because I know there are a whole lot of hate boards and an entire Rage Against the Machine movement that would support that.

Amy: Haha listen, I'm on summer break and away from school... I can do/say anything I want!! Ok? Good!

Me: Perhaps you should practice what you preach and leave us to obtain the opinion that 1D are a calamity upon our society.

Amy: I DON'T PREACH! Maybe you should start learning what could hurt other peoples religion!

WHAT. THE. ACTUAL. FUCK.

Me: It's a phrase. It doesn't refer to religion in any aspect. I'm an atheist anyways, so I didn't mean it in a religious sense.

Amy: Well other people might not know that!!!

Me: The general population is aware of the phrase 'practice what you preach'. Anyways, this conversation is dead, considering the fact that you've resorted to personal insults in the hope you'll gain precedence over me. I'm gonna go listen to a worthwhile band such as Nirvana, goodbye.

Amy: Haha, you are funny!!! Byeee darling!!

COOL PARAMORE GIRL INTERJECTS WITH EXTREMELY INTELLIGENT VIEW ON DIRECTIONERS WHO PROWL FOR HATE BOARDS.

Compared to TROLL WAR TWO, this girl was a fucking genius. Paramore girl is also involved in Troll War Two. We're like a team against shitty music.

I POST RANDOM DISS ABOUT 1D

H: (Asks me why I hate 1D)

Me: (I repeat myself)

H: (Accepts it, tells me she disagrees but respects opinions.)

Me: No probs.

H: (Repeats earlier comment)

Me Okay. Cool.

OH DEAR. HERE'S THE GIRL I WAS ON ABOUT.

1L: We'll DA FABULOUIS person has arrived and they never told a five year old to kill herself yet I had to explain to my cousin what self harming was since she was asking

(I earlier referred to the situation in which Directioners launched an attack against Mitch Lucker's 5 year old daughter Kenadee.)

Me: They told Mitch Lucker's daughter to kill herself. 

1L: They wouldn't since its about not cutting or killing yourself ain't possible mate

Louise Xx: I'll link you to a post with the evidence to prove it.

-

1L: (talking about the multiple people saying shit about Mitch Lucker) That shitface isn't a fan no fan would say that only the ones that are on drugs would

COOL PTV FAN: There's a lot of Directioners all up on Mitch and Alex (Gaskarth)'s cases

1L: Really??!!? I'm just a fan who hates on the haters who hate to much

Me: These are all several different people so infatuated with the anything vaguely 1D related that they would say things like that and I find it shocking that you would dare defend a fanbase that threatens small children.

Me: (REALISES GIRL IS INSANE AND TRIES DESPERATE ATTEMPT TO LIGHTEN THE MOOD) Grand philosophical question- if you hate haters, are you a hater?

ATTEMPT IS IGNORED

1L: WELL NOT ALL OF US THREATENS SMALL CHILDREN DO YOU SEE EVERY SINGLE DIRECTIONER ON TWITTER THREATENING PEOPLE!!!!!? I STICK UP FOR THE FANS WHO ARE GETTING HATED ON!!

COOL PTV FAN: No offense to you personally 1L, but about 70% of your fanbase is overly obsessed ten year olds.

1L: I don't hate on a daily basis.

Me: (sick of this fucking bitch) Calm the fuck down, due to the atrocity of the hate from your fanbase, you really don't have any moral ground to stand on here.

1L: The ten year olds don't have social media

Me: And (COOL PTV FAN) is completely correct. And btw Jaime Preciado is cool AF. (Refers to her profile pic.)

1L: Louise u hate on my fan base and idols i will slay you

Me: (uninterested) Oh dear, I hope you don't caps lock me to death.

COOL PTV FAN: Jaime is fabulous isn't he xD

COOL PTV FAN: (referencing my comeback) *z snap*

Me: Haha, thank you, yes he is fabulous, as is Pierce the Veil as a band. (I'm a PTV fan, deal with it.)

1L: No just no


Me: No, to what exactly?

COOL PTV FAN: (flips) Excuse me lady? I haven't offended your favourite band, don't you DARE offend mine.

1L: This Jamie (fucking hell, it was just posted, learn to read woman) isn't fabulous and pierce the veil isn't as well

Me: I don't see any PTV fans threatening Directioners, do I?

COOL PTV FAN: Shut the fuck up and go back to your princess fandom. 

1L: U

COOL PTV FAN: Get the fuck out 1L

COOL PARAMORE GIRL: (Swoops in) Okay! I haven't read all these comments yet but (PTV FAN) chick, shut up. I hate 1D on a whole different level but 1L here obviously isn't a hater (debatable) so leave her alone! You're setting a bad name for the people who listen to our music. You say you want peace but from the looks of it that's nothing the three of you want so just stop. 1L get off this board, it's not where you belong, as for (PTV FAN) and Louise I'll read the rest and explain my POV afterwards.

Me: I agree completely (PARAMORE GIRL), I get way too het up, but in all fairness telling me she was going to kill me really wasn't necessary.

1L: (Post some shit and deletes it)

Me: 1L, this argument is completely hollow, just leave please.

PARAMORE GIRL: (turns on 1L) 1L just no. Get off now. I am a very passive person until you diss something I really care about. No asks you if you like PTV just GET OFF! Enough! Geez!

1L: (Posts something incomprehensible.)

Me: 1L? That wasn't coherent English, and Isa, Paramore rules, your taste is fabulous.

BRACE YOURSELVES FOR THE MOST UNINTELLIGENT COMMENT I'VE EVER SEEN.

IL: Coherent??? What I'm speaking English which is British English


OH MY FUCKING GOD SOCIETY DOESN'T NEED PEOPLE LIKE YOU PLEASE FLY TO THE MOON AND DON'T FUCKING BREED ON THIS EARTH.

I didn't say that, obviously.

PARAMORE GIRL: (Responds to my Paramore comment and chest bumps me via the internet because she's one cool motherfucker.

I refuse to respond to 1L because she's an ignorant twat.

Saturday, 2 August 2014

Spamming My Favourite Celebs Will DEFINITELY Make Them Love Me!!!

If you've ever been on a celebrity twitter account, you'll probably have noticed that some people can be a little... over-zealous. It's common among fans of One Direction to spam them with twenty or so requests for follow backs because it would 'make them happy forever' etc etc.
However, what some people don't seem to realize is that you're a needle in a haystack. Most of the time, they won't even see your tweet, and sometimes, if you spam them THAT much, they'll block you. For instance;
This was copied and pasted from Twitter. I only took the username out for anonymity.

@Harry_Styles
Hi Toronto. I'm very much looking forward to seeing you.
RETWEETS
66,659
FAVORITES
116,401
REPLIES
@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx1

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx2

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx3

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx4

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx5

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx6

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx7

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx8

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx9

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx10

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx11

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx12

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx13

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx14

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx15

@Harry_Styles hey baby, I've been supporting u since the beginning and i hope that one i can be part of those lucky people you follow. xx16

There was a series of other tweets reading exactly the same.
If anyone did that to me, I'd tell them to piss off, but they simply can't purely because of the sheer amount of spamming their fans do. Not only this, but the language.
Hey, baby!
YOU. AREN'T. DATING. HARRY. STYLES.
Someone said to me yesterday someone said "It never ceases to amaze me the amount of sexually frustrated thirteen year olds who fantasize about having sex with the members of 5SOS and One Direction." and that perfectly encapsulates the entire situation.

ANOTHER SITUATION- haters. Before I begin, a pose a philosophical question.
No, but seriously. NEWSFLASH CHILDREN, your idols couldn't give less of a fuck about people hating on them, there's no need to protect them.
E.g. if someone posts a statement such as "Young Kellin Quinn looks like an emo Harry Styles." (Harry Styles wishes, Kellin Quinn is the lead singer of Sleeping With Sirens, his voice is kind of annoying in my opinion, but there is no denying he's one beautiful motherfucker) there is no need for you to start up a fight.
^Kellin Quinn^

For instance, after I made a tweet that simply read "Jesus, I don't know why you'd like One Direction when there are bands like Pantera, that offer ACTUAL talent.". Harsh, perhaps, but nevertheless I got about twelve responses that all went along the lines of
"Ur jus jelus cuz 1D hav soooo much talent."
"STFU EMO!"
"Who dafuq is panterra r they like the vamps"
"Haterz gonna hate!"
"Ignor her @onedirection, dont let her hurt ur feelins"

Calm down!
Another thing is the trending topics. Now, I often look at the trending topics because I'm extremely interested in politics (yes, a 15 year old who likes Pantera and politics, they do exist) but there is nothing worthwhile- it's all #LOUISTOMLINSONAPPRECIATIONDAY and #WELOVEYOUZAYN and all that shit.

THINGS ONE DIRECTIONS FANS MUST LEARN

THE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD DOES NOT REVOLVE AROUND ONE DIRECTION AND THE MANUFACTURED EVENTS IN THEIR UNDESERVEDLY DECADENT LIVES. 

ANYONE WHO RESPECTS MUSIC HAS PRETTY MUCH EARNED THE RIGHT TO TREAT YOU ALL LIKE SHIT, SINCE THE COMMENTS MADE TOWARDS MITCH AND KENADEE LUCKER.

If you aren't aware, frontman of the deathcore band Suicide Silence Mitch Lucker passed away a while back and was met with comments from Directioners such as 'thank God he's dead, what an emo fag.' promptly followed by insults towards his daughter Kenadee such as 'If Kenadee Lucker misses her dad so much why doesn't she just kill herself too and stop whining.'

Oh yeah, Kenadee Lucker was five.
Five years old.
Five.

My closing statement?

One Direction should really go fuck themselves for all the good they spread across our already quite talent-free society.

Wednesday, 30 July 2014

5 Seconds Of Summer and Their Quest to be Punk-Rock

I am a long time reader of Rocksound Magazine, which is, for those of you who don't know, an English publication similar to the likes of Kerrang, The Rolling Stones, or Alternative Press.
This month's issue was a fantastic one, perhaps to make up for the controversy that would inevitably surround it. The cover band, were 5 Seconds of Summer, or 5SOS, as I will stylize them because I can't be bothered to type that out every time I refer to them.
In the issue, 5SOS discussed their adoration for bands such as Asking Alexandria and Blink-182, the fact that they are 'currently' confined to pop music, and how they believe that image will change over time. The writers at Rocksound, bless them, attempted to make it look like a good thing.
"When you first started listening to All Time Low, did you hear them namecheck Blink-182 and look them up? When you first stumbled across Avenged Sevenfold, did you have to see Guns and Roses for yourself to find out what all the fuss was about? 5 Seconds of Summer are about to do the very same thing, and turn a generation of kids currently familiar with nothing outside of the charts onto the likes of Mayday Parade, Yellowcard, All Time Low and countless others."
Whilst, at first, this might appeal to you. What's wrong with other people liking your bands? Absolutely nothing, that's what. (Unless you're a hipster, of course.) However, the people who are currently fans of 5SOS tend to be fans of One Direction, given that they toured together. One Direction are clearly a band that cannot be described as anything but pop.
With that in mind, let's think of what happened when 5SOS covered the originally beautiful songs, I Miss You by Blink-182. If you head to the original video on YouTube, the comments have now been littered with 5SOS fans saying things such as;
"5SoS is way better. This crap is scary and depressing. Stop bashing on my fav band like omg. They made this song way more popular than it was. If anything, this crappy band should cover it. Like omg."
No, that wasn't a joke. That was a legitimate comment that had been posted. There is also;
"This cover is good, but the original by 5SOS is still the best."

I can't deal with that. Blink-182 is one of my favourite bands, and everytime I go on that song, the comments infuriate me.
Props to the 5SOS boys, they seem reasonably intelligent, and they are aware that people don't like them. In fact, they've quite happily accepted it. However, their justifications in being 'the next big punk thing' are really lacking. One of those justifications being, for some inexplicable reason, that they must be punk because they've got a massive dedicated following.
Now, bands like Metallica and Pantera both have massive dedicated followings, and nobody in their right mind would ever label them pop, however the fans of bands like Metallica are not as dedicated in the same way.
For instance, major Metallica mega-fans might possibly buy all the merch and go to several gigs on the same tour, something like that. Perhaps even the most over-zealous of them would jump at Lars on the street, but that would be extremely softcore for the 5SOS Fam. (That's what their fanbase is called, I hear.)
Ashton (Irwin, drummer) goes on to explain that at a photo shoot, a picture was uploaded to Instagram featuring him sat in a chair shaped like an arse. Doesn't sound bad so far, does it? Not exactly 'top, top banter' as Rocksound describes it, but not bad at all.
Within thirty minutes, their fans had searched the web for every photo studio in Manchester that had the arse shaped chair and travelled there to spot 'the boys'.
Oh dear.
Bear in mind, their fans average from the ages of about 8-18, and this saga unfolded on a Thursday afternooon, so I imagine a lot skipped school do follow this exhilarating adventure only to discover that thirty  minutes was far too long and the 5SOS guys had already left.
They also go on about the rock and roll lifestyle.
"There's no one telling us 'Don't do that!'. We're very real online, as well. I post pictures of Calum's arse. We're over 18 years old. Sure, I might get drunk every now and then, that's normal. Okay, maybe more than every now and then, but we just have fun. We're teenagers."

They then go on to briefly discuss the fact that they want to save rock and roll. I hate that. But I won't attack them for it, because a lot of bands do it, and I'm a major FOB fan, but I refuse to buy their fantastic Save Rock And Roll album purely because of the title. (And perhaps the price, but mostly the title.) So I think it's just a personal pet peeve. I don't know though, if it annoys you, leave a comment.
Rocksound, being the brilliant publication it is, (no sarcasm, they're literally awesome) don't hesitate to acknowledge One Direction's overtone on 5SOS. 5SOS go to say One Direction gave them a fantastically gigantic opportunity to tour the world, and it seems understandable to a point. They name-drop Dave Grohl, saying that they always wanted to play a stadium like the Foo Fighters do and they got an oppurtunity.
They, then, make a fatal mistake.

"All of a sudden, we're supporting in a stadium and looking out at 90,000 people. You'd be insane to go 'Oh, stuff this! I'm going to play to my crowd of 7000 people."

In that sentence alone, my suspicions are confirmed, and every hope 5SOS have ever held of being perceived as even vaguely punk shatters around them. They're sellouts. You'd 'stuff' playing that stadium because of principles. Society projects forth an image of the perfect person, and punk still is, and always has been about saying "Fuck that! I'll do whatever I want!" and doing whatever you want. Punk was meant to be a war on mainstream, and once you tour with a band, you effectively connect yourself to them, and to connect yourself to perhaps the most mainstream band of the moment loses you any right whatsoever to call yourself punk.
That's my little rant. Please don't hate on me. Leave you're opinions though. If you disagree, I'll converse.